


Your Voice Is Pretty, Did You Know That?

by TheBetterLookingTwin



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Bullying, Car Accidents, Claustrophobia, Deaf Character, High School AU, Hospitals, Humor, I'm Bad At Tagging, It's not totally angst i swear, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, New Student, No Smut, School, Suicidal Thoughts, bad therapists, deaf!Phil, lifts, slight homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-05
Updated: 2017-03-18
Packaged: 2018-09-28 12:23:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10100675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBetterLookingTwin/pseuds/TheBetterLookingTwin
Summary: Dan howell is the new kid in the school and doesn't think he will make any friends. However, a boy with a black fringe catches his eye but when Dan tries to talk to him the boy ignores him. Dan wonders why and tries harder.In the end Dan befriends Phil and they try to survive through bullying and problems together. But what is Phil's backstory and why is Dan claustrophobic?





	1. The Boy With A Black Fringe

**Author's Note:**

> Hi You!
> 
> Welcome to read my first captered fic which I'm planning on updating about every two days. I want to wish you good reading time and I hope you enjoy this chapter :)
> 
> Text between these / marks are written by Phil or Dan to make it clearer

Dan Howell had never had any friends. He really didn’t mind because he liked to spend time on his own. However there were times he missed having a best friend. Going to movies was one of them. He didn’t want to go alone because that was just sad so he often asked his mom or his brother to join him. And when they couldn’t, he didn’t go to movies.

When he entered the new school he didn’t have any expectations about it. He knew he wouldn't get any friends so he wasn’t nervous. Dan decided to walk straight to his class and just see what would happen. He had gotten a message from his new teacher that said that he should come to school half an hour later than others so she could prepare the class. Dan didn’t mind it, actually he thought it was better like this.

As he reached the classroom door he checked once more it was the right door. 205. Yes, it was the right one. He knocked the door and a short woman opened it. Dan himself was 6’3” tall so he was not surprised to see shorter people.

“Good morning!” The woman greeted him. “You must be Daniel”.

“Yes. Nice to meet you Mrs…?”

“Mrs. Moore. I am your teacher. Come in. I can introduce you to your classmates”.

“Sure” Dan said and walked in the room.

“So, everyone. This is your new classmate Daniel Howell. He will be joining your classes” Mrs. Moore explained to everyone.

“Just call me Dan”, Dan said quickly. He was so awkward just standing there in front of the class.

“Tell us something about yourself Dan” Mrs. Moore said.

“Well my name is Dan and I like watching movies. And I also play video games” Dan said. He never knew what to say when someone asked him to tell about himself.

“That’s nice. You can go sit now. There is still one seat left in the back. You can sit there”

“Okay” Dan said and walked to his seat.

“Okay class! We still have ten minutes until break and I would like you to just speak to each others. Tell about your holiday and how are you feeling about this new school year” Mrs. Moore said and sat down behind her table.

Dan hated things like this. He never had someone to talk to. He just sat in silence and looked around the room and other people. He would like to tell someone about his holiday and maybe make some friends. There was a very loud group of boys on the other side of the room. They were shouting and telling about their holidays very precisely. Dan decided to stay away from them. Loud people made him feel sick. In the front there was a group of girls in full make up, trying to flirt with the loud boys. They were the ‘popular girls’, Dan deduced. Everyone in the class was talking to someone and Dan felt a little bit lonely. Then his eyes landed on a boy who was sitting one desk away from him on his right. The boy had deep black hair that was cut in a fringe. It was like Dan’s hair but Dan had brown fringe. The boy wasn’t talking to anyone. He was drawing something, his face so close to the paper that it was a miracle he could see anything. Dan had just decided to go to talk to him when the bell rang. He could talk to the boy during the break.

“Hey!” Dan said to the black haired boy. He didn’t say anything back. Dan thought that it was a bit rude.

“Hi! How are you?” Dan tried again. No answer. Dan decided to give up and sat down on a chair, took out his phone and started to scroll Twitter.

It was time of the next class, which was biology. Who invented the school system? It’s the first day of school and they already had real school! Dan was the last one to enter the class and the only free place to sit was next to that black haired boy. Dan didn’t want to sit next to him, because he probably hated Dan. As he had no other options, he eventually did.

“Welcome everyone. It’s your first biology class today and we will start studying right away!” The teacher said. He was quite old man who tried to dress fashionably. He had black jeans and a bomber jacket. However he didn’t look that stylish. He was clearly hyped about biology and studying.

“Take out your textbooks and read the first chapter!”

Dan hated biology. He opened his textbook but didn’t read it. Instead he noticed that the boy next to him wasn’t reading either. He was drawing that same picture as before. It was a picture of a cat and Dan had to admit that it was good one. The cat was sitting on grass and licking it’s paw. There was some chattering in class and Dan ventured to say something to the boy.

“You’re very good at drawing” Dan said silently, loud enough to be heard.

The boy didn’t answer. Dan started to get annoyed. He poked the boy in the arm. As he did so, the black haired boy jumped and looked scared.

“Why don’t you answer to me when I’m talking to you?” Dan asked him.

The boy didn’t say anything but Dan had to admit that his eyes were magical. They were bright blue but at the same time they were green and yellow. So pretty. But now the boy was writing something on on his notebook. Dan waited for a moment and then the boy handed him the paper.

/I’m sorry/ ,It said, /I am deaf and can’t hear you. You scared me, but it’s okay/

Dan’s eyes widened. He had tried to talk to the boy but he hadn’t heard him! He wasn’t being rude. Dan felt stupid. He decided to write back.

/Sorry, I didn’t know. I tried to talk to you earlier but you didn’t hear me. I thought you were being rude but now I know better/ Dan wrote and handed the notebook back to the boy.

/I’m not being rude don’t worry. My name is Phil by the way. Nice to meet you/

/I’m Dan. Nice to meet you too/

The boys passed notes the whole class, talking about movies and stuff they liked, totally forgetting biology. After the class Dan and Phil exchanged their phone numbers and Phil promised to text Dan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How cool! :D  
> Did you like it? Was there something I should do differently? Please leave a comment and remember to subscribe so you'll be notified when I upload the next chapter!
> 
> (I sound like a youtuber. Maybe I should do a sexy endscreen dance? maybe not)


	2. I'm Allowed To Smile!

Couple of days later Dan was doing his homework when suddenly he heard a ding from his pocket. It was a text from Phil.

“Hi Dan”

“Hi Phil! How’s life?” Dan was almost embarrassed about himself.

“Life is feeling sick today. I’m good tho” Phil texted back.

Dan laughed a bit and texted: “Would you like to come over soon?”

“No” Phil texted.

Dan was disappointed. He thought Phil would’ve wanted to hang out with him.

“But you should come to my house :)” Phil texted again.

Dan smiled, feeling relieved. Phil was just as sassy as he was. Dan texted back: “I’m on my way. Be prepared”

\---

Dan arrived to Phil’s house fifteen minutes later. Phil had texted Dan his address and it turned out that Dan lived only 5 kilometres from him. Dan walked to the wooden front door with a small name sign in it that said “Lester”. He rang the doorbell and soon a woman with curly blonde hair came to open the door.

“Hello, who are you?” The woman asked, looking suspicious.

“I’m Dan. I came to meet Phil”

“Really? That’s nice!” Dan could see from the woman’s face that Phil didn’t have many visitors. “He is at upstairs. Second door at left” The woman said.

“Thank you” Dan said politely and headed upstairs.

The Lesters had a traditional british house with two floors and very narrow frontage. The decorating was traditional and warm, unlike Dan’s home. He opened Phil’s door and saw Phil lying down on his bed. He was reading. Dan waved his hand trying to get his attention. Phil noticed him and gestured him to come to the bed. Dan sat beside him and Phil handed him a note.

/I have hearing aids. Would you like me to use them?/

/If you feel comfortable with it. That would be awesome/ Dan wrote back. He really didn’t know what to say to things like that.

Phil smiled and raised one finger in air as a gesture to wait. Dan sat in place and watched as Phil headed to his drawer and after short digging he found them. Two little pieces of blue plastic. Phil put them in his ears and turned them on.

“Now we can talk” Phil said. His voice was a bit hoarse because he hadn’t used it in a while.

“Can you hear me?” Dan asked. It was a miracle.

“Yeah. Not perfectly but I understand” Phil answered. His voice was lower than Dan’s.

“That’s awesome!” Dan said happily.

“Yeah I think so. Your voice is pretty, did you know that?”

Dan blushed. No one had ever told him he was pretty.

“Thanks. Your voice isn’t bad either”

“I think it’s horrible. It’s so hoarse and dark. I hate it” Phil said sounding a bit sad.

“It’s not. Trust me” Dan said and smiled to Phil. “Why don’t you wear them at school?  
Wouldn’t it be easier to understand things?”

“It would, but they give me headache if I wear them all day”

“Oh” Dan was quite touched that Phil has put his hearing aids on for him.

“Do you want to play something?” Phil asked.

“What games do you have?

“I have loads. Mario Kart is my favourite!” Phil said excitedly.

“Mine too! Let’s play it!”

The boys played Mario Kart for three hours, chatting about random stuff and shouting at the game. Dan was a master in Mario Kart but didn’t win Phil all the time. Phil was actually pretty great. Both boys had smiles on their faces and Dan felt happier than ever before. Unfortunately it was getting dark and Dan decided to head back home. He said goodbye to Phil and left. As he was walking on the pavement he suddenly heard a voice shouting at him:

"Why are you smiling you little twat?"

Dan turned around, heart pumping in his throat. The shouter was a drunk guy on the other side of the road. Normally Dan would've ignored those kind of shouts but today he was in too high spirits to do so.

"I made a friend today so I'm allowed to smile!" Dan shouted, turned back and continued walking. He was smiling and felt warm inside. He, Dan Howell, had finally made a friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be a lot longer than this! Remember to subscribe so you'll be notified when the next chapter is up, which is in couple of days!
> 
> Have a nice day! :)


	3. Getting To Know You

Phil woke up the next day and saw that it was raining. Oh how great. He wanted to just lie in bed and forget the world. Then he remembered. Dan. Dan would be in school. Thought of Dan got him up from bed in a second. He jumped down the stairs happily. His mom was making breakfast and as he heard Phil jumping down the stairs she smiled and turned to face him.

“Good morning darling” Phil’s mom signed.

“Morning mom!” Phil signed back.

“You look happy. Is there something special about this day?”

Phil blushed a bit, “Nothing particular. I’m just feeling happy”

“Okay” Phil’s mother smiled. “Who was that boy yesterday? Was he from school?”

“It was Dan. He is new in my class and we have become friends. At least I hope so” Phil signed and really hoped that Dan was his friend.

“He seemed really cool! You have found a really nice friend” Phil’s mom signed to him and continued: “I have to leave to work in a minute. Can you make it to school by yourself?”

“Of course mom!” Phil signed. His mother was so worried about him all the time! “I’m 16! Of course I can get to school on my own!”

“I know. I just want to make sure. I’ll be back at 5 pm. I’ll make dinner” Phil’s mother signed, left the kitchen and headed to front door.

Phil smiled. His mother usually forgot that he was, in fact, almost an adult. Even his own mother would underestimate him sometimes. He was fully capable of taking care of himself, even though he was deaf. That’s what many people were unable to see.

Phil decided to eat quickly so he could be early in school. He really wanted to meet Dan again. He ate two slices of toast and headed to upstairs. Phil pulled on his black skinny jeans and his yellow hoodie with Jake from Adventure Time on it. He wanted to feel cosy today and hoodies were perfect for that. Then Phil stood still for solid five minutes, staring at his hearing aids. Those little blue pieces that could make him hear. He had never worn them to school. They would make him hear Dan’s voice. He could actually talk to Dan. Would it be worth it? Of course it would. He had had the best time of his life last night, playing video games with Dan. Of course he would wear his hearing aids.

\------

“Dan!” Phil shouted and hurried towards the brown haired boy.

“Phil!” Dan said sounding surprised. “You’re wearing your hearing aids!”

“Yeah. I thought that it would be easier if we could talk, right?”

“Of course it is! But I don’t want you to suffer. If they start to hurt you can take them off” Dan said looking worried.

“I’m fine! It’s not that long anyway”

Suddenly the school bell rang.

“Our class starts! Great to start the day with english!” Dan said sarcastically.

“Was that the alarm to go to class? I’ve never heard it before. I thought it was just someone playing music!” Phil said. He was thankful he had Dan to guide him.

“Phil, that’s not music. That’s the sound of pure torture” Dan said. He grabbed Phil’s hand and dragged him to english class.

\---

It had been 10 minutes and Phil was already bored. Being able to hear didn’t make classes more interesting. But at least he could actually learn something else than just what’s written in books.

“So, your project for today is to take a pair and make an short interview. You can ask about your pair’s family or about their interests. Feel free to use your imagination. When you are done you have to write down what you learned about the other person and what kind of similarities you found about each other. This work will be graded and it will have effect to your grade. Start!” Their teacher guided them and sat down behind her table.

Dan and Phil looked at each other and agreed with just one look that they would do this assignment together.

“So, Phil” Dan started with his best therapist voice, “What kind of family do you have?”

“Well it’s me, my brother, my mom and my dad. Dad is not at home that often, but he’s my favourite person in the world. I miss him” Phil answered.

“Okay. My family consists of me, my little brother, and my mother. My mom and dad are divorced and I haven’t seen him in, like, 7 years. But it’s fine because he was kinda mean and stuff.” Dan said, trying to sound happier than he was. Phil noticed this and gave Dan a small smile.

“Sorry to hear that”

“It’s fine. It’s not that big of a deal” Dan shrugged it off.

  
“Right. My turn then. Hmmm… What are you interested in? I mean, other than video games” Phil chuckled.

“Well I really like music”

“What’s your favourite band?” Phil said, sounding interested.

“I love Muse. Their music is just perfect!” Dan said feeling confident to share his favourite band.

“Oh my god I love Muse too! What’s your favourite song?”

“I really can’t choose. All of them are good” Dan said. He felt like a fake fan for saying that.

“That’s the right answer” Phil said beaming. “Now we can officially be best friends!”

“Great! I’ve never had a best friend before” Dan said quietly.

“What did you say? I didn’t hear” Phil said, trying not to sound rude.

“Oh nothing” Dan said feeling embarrassed. He had forgotten that Phil still couldn’t hear him perfectly.

“Okay. Your turn now Dan”

“Hmm… Let me think. What is your favourite subject?” Lame, Dan thought.

“Hmmm… I think it’s art. You don’t have to talk to people there” Phil said but then he saw Dan who looked a bit offended. “I love talking to you Dan! Don’t feel offended, I didn’t mean it that way”

“I know. I just kinda felt betrayed since I have never had any friends before. No one ever liked me and stuff” Dan said sadly.

“Don’t worry!” Phil said and put his hand on Dan’s shoulder. “You are my best friend and I will never leave you” Phil said, smiling to Dan who smiled back.

“What’s your favourite subject then? PE, am I right?” Phil joked, trying to cheer Dan up.

“PE is the worst” Dan said, “I think my favourite is drama class. You don’t have to do anything but it’s nice to participate occasionally."

“I’ve never had drama. No one thought it would be good to me. I agree with them” Phil said.

“Do you think this is enough? I mean, Can we write about this already?” Dan asked. Maybe they could leave the class earlier if they finished their project.

“I have one more question!” Phil said. “If you could choose, what superpower would you have?”

“Ooh I like this one! I would probably choose the power to teleport. Then I wouldn’t have to travel ever again” Dan said.

“Cool. I would take the ability to stop time. Then you would never have to read to tests or anything. You could just stop the time and check the answer!”

“You have really thought about this” Dan laughed.

“Yeah. But now it’s time to let my shakespeare out and write my heart out to that piece of white, blank paper” Phil announced dramatically and picked up his pen. Dan laughed and started to write too.

Phil had so much inspiration for this paper. He decided to make it perfect and surprise his teacher.

/The person I interviewed was Dan Howell. I didn’t know him that well, because we met only yesterday. However, we have become very good friends. I asked him some questions and found many similarities.  
Dan started and asked me about my family. I told him that I have a big brother, mother and a father. My father is usually away working but I still see him on weekends and holidays.  
I then asked about Dan’s family. He told me that he had a little brother and a mother. His parents have divorced and his father left. Dan haven’t seen him ever since. Our families are different but we both love them.  
Another question I made for Dan was about his music taste.../

“Phil, how do you spell shakespeare?” Dan suddenly whispered, loud enough to be heard.

“Um… ‘S-H-A-K-E-S-P-E-A-R-E’ I think. It’s like ‘shake’ then ‘spear’ and in the end ‘e’” Phil said. Dan laughed at Phil’s spelling games and continued his paper.

/Another question I made for Dan was about his music taste. He said he liked Muse, which is an english band. I love muse too and I was very happy to find someone who liked the same music as me! Dan couldn’t name his favourite song but neither can I. They are all excellent!  
Dan asked the next question. What is my favourite subject? I hate almost every subject but I like art the most. It’s mainly because you don’t have to talk or participate in any way. Dan’s favourite subject is drama. He likes it because you don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to but Dan likes acting so it’s made for him. Maybe someday he will become an actor.  
I learned that my friend and I have similarities but also many differences. I see differences as a good thing because without them life would be dull. Being different is what makes us human and we should be more open to people of any kind. I look forward to get to know Dan better and seeing what other things we have in common./

Phil was proud of his paper. It was the best he had ever wrote. He looked over at Dan who was writing fervently. He must be inspired about this work too.

“Are you ready Dan?” Phil whispered to his friend.

“Just a second” Dan said, not lifting his look from the paper. “Now I’m ready!”

“Do we have to just give these to our teacher and we can then leave?”

“Yeah I think so” Dan replied and stood up, followed by Phil. They walked to the front and gave their papers to their teacher.

“Great job boys. I’ll read these through and I’ll probably give these back to you after weekend” She said, smiled and told them to leave.

Dan and Phil walked out of the door and stood at the hallway for a moment.

“That Shakespeare word play was quite amazing Phil” Dan said.

“Yeah. I invented it when I read his plays. His name is quite hard to remember so I thought why not make it easier. Just shaking some spears” Phil laughed.

“You are amazing! I have always struggled with it. Now I won’t have any problems”

“No problem” Phil said and smiled, happy that he could help.

“What time is it?” Dan asked from Phil.

“Umm.. let me check” Phil answered and took out his phone. “It’s half past ten. It’s almost lunch time”

“Thank god. I’m starving” Dan said and started to walk towards benches nearby. Phil followed and sat beside Dan. Dan was resting his head on the back of the bench.

“Do you have any idea what’s for lunch?” Phil asked. He was feeling hungry too.

“I think it was some kind of fish. I’m not sure” Dan answered.

“Okay. Do you want to do something before lunch or are we just going to sit here and sleep?” Phil asked, hoping for some action.

“Do you have any money? We could go to a restaurant to have lunch” Dan said suddenly.

“I have some. I don’t know if it’s enough tho” Phil said unsurely.

“I’ll pay for you if you don’t have enough. It’s okay. Let’s go?”

Phil nodded and the boys started to walk towards the front doors. It didn’t take long until they heard a loud voice from behind them.

“Hey loser! Can you hear me or are you just stupid?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooh, what will happen? You'll find out in the next chapter which will be up in couple of days!
> 
> Feedback is giving me strength so comment and like!  
> Remember to subscribe so you won't miss the next chapter!
> 
> Have a nice day! :)


	4. F*cking Batteries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god thank you so much to everyone that has read this story so far! I never imagined anyone would want to read this but I was wrong. Thank you

“Hey loser! Can you hear me or are you just stupid?” Someone shouted in the hallway when Dan and Phil were heading to the front doors of the school, their stomachs rumbling.

Dan stopped in his tracks and turned around. He was facing a muscular boy with blonde hair. The boy was shorter than either Dan or Phil but he was at least twice as wide.

“What did you say?” Dan asked sounding threatening.

“I asked if your friend is stupid” The boy answered with an evil smirk.

“I’m not stupid!” Phil said snapped standing forward from behind Dan.

“Oh you have learned to talk, have you?” The boy said sarcastically, “That’s progress.   
Someday you might not be a weirdo anymore”

“I don’t care about your opinion! You are just a pathetic sqvirvel! Leave me alone!” Phil said. He was getting seriously angry to this boy.

“A sqvirvel! What does that even mean? I was wrong. You can’t talk! You are just a loser!” The boy laughed at Phil.

“Go away! Don’t say a word about Phil or your face will resemble an elephant’s ass” Dan said firmly and looked the boy straight in his eyes.

“You know what? If I were you I would stay away from Phil Lester. It’s for your own good. If you are friends with him you are enemies with me. That’s just how it goes. However, I will leave you alone. For now. Have fun freaks!” He then turned around and strode off.

“Fuck you!” Dan shouted to the boy but the boy ignored him. “Are you okay Phil?” Dan turned around but Phil wasn’t there. He was at the front door, heading outside and looking miserable.

“Phil! Phil wait!” Dan ran after him and caught Phil just a moment later. “Phil what’s wrong?”

“Go away Dan. You don’t want to be with me. It’s for your own good. Just like Jason said, I’m just a freak and everyone near me gets bullied too” Phil said, not looking at Dan.

“I’m not leaving you! I don’t care about bullies. I was bullied too so I can take it. You need a friend and I am your best friend. It’s my duty” Dan said taking Phil’s hand in his own.

Phil looked at Dan: “If you think so. Thank you. I really can’t imagine life without you anymore” Phil said quietly.

“Me neither Phil. Me neither”

\----

Dan and Phil decided to go to nearest Subway, because they didn’t have enough money to eat in a real restaurant. When they arrived to the building it was almost full. Luckily there was a small table of two in front of a big window. Both of the boys ordered chicken teriyaki subs and carried them to the table. The view from the window was amazing. Because the restaurant was on the third floor they were able to see over nearest buildings. They were even able to see their school which was two blocks away.

“I haven’t eaten Subway for a long time!” Dan said pleasantly.

“I have never eaten it before. My mom wouldn’t let me eat anything ‘unhealthy’” Phil said.

“No way! This is the best sandwich you can possibly have!”

“I hope so. I just ordered what you did. I hope you have a good taste! Because if you don’t I’ll blame you” Phil said smiling happily.

“Don’t worry. It’s the best one. I promise”

Phil took a bite of the bread. It tasted like chicken and fresh vegetables. It was delicious.

“This is so good! Why haven’t I tried this before?” Phils asked eyes wide open from delightment.

“I told you so. Don’t start drooling” Dan laughed.

“I try to control myself” Phil said and took a big bite of the sandwich.

The boys ate their lunches and stood up to leave. Dan took their trash to the bin and returned to Phil who was waiting for him.

“How much do I ove you?” Phil asked.

“Phil it’s pronounced owe. And your are not in debt. It was my treat”

“Oh okay. I didn’t know it was pronounced like that. I have never used it before now when I think about it” Phil said thoughtfully.

“You pronounced squirrel wrong too. That’s why that Jason laughed to you. But it’s okay. It doesn’t matter to me” Dan told Phil.

“Oh I’m so stupid! That’s what you get for not talking much. Please tell me if I pronounce something wrong!” Phil cried to Dan who promised to tell.

The boys were walking to the school and Dan was telling Phil about his old dog he had when he was a child when suddenly Phil couldn’t hear him anymore. Everything went quiet even though Dan’s mouth was still moving. Phil stopped and looked at Dan, fear in his eyes. Dan looked back to him and said something. Phil couldn’t read lips so he had no idea what Dan was saying. He pointed at his ear and shaked his head. Dan looked confused for a moment but finally got the idea. Phil’s hearing aids had run out of battery. And because Phil wasn’t used to wearing them, he had no extra batteries with him. Dan handed his phone to Phil. He had written a text in it.

/Your hearing aids don’t work, am I right? What’s wrong?/

Phil typed quickly back: /It must be the batteries. I never remember to change them/

/We should go and buy you new ones. I can pay them for you/

/Ok. The supermarket has them I hope/ Phil typed and started to walk towards the nearest supermarket. He hoped they had the right batteries for him.

When they arrived to the supermarket Dan poked Phil gently at his arm to get his attention. Phil read the text Dan had written:

/Can I see the batteries?/

Phil took his aid out of his ear and took the battery out. It was flat and small. It looked like a button. Dan took the battery and waved his hand to tell Phil to follow him. Phil did and they walked deeper into the shop. Dan saw a shop assistant and walked towards her. Phil followed silently and let Dan do his work. Dan said something to the woman and showed her the batteries. She shook her head. Dan turned to face Phil, looking disappointed. He typed a text quickly and gave it to Phil.

/She said they don’t have batteries. She will look from the back but can’t promise anything/

Phil felt his stomach drop. He nodded to Dan and smiled a little. Dan smiled back and they waited in silence to the shop assistant to arrive.

The woman came back five minutes later. She had something in her hand and Phil felt a hint of hope in his chest. Dan said something to the woman and she gave him something. It was probably the batteries! Dan said something to the woman and then she left. Dan turned towards Phil and showed him the batteries, his face lit up with joy. Phil smiled widely and clapped his hands a little. Then Dan pointed towards checkout and Phil followed him.

When the boys waited in line someone poked Phil at his back. He turned around and saw an old woman looking at him and her mouth moving. Phil didn’t understand and he turned back at Dan. Dan looked at him and saw his panicked face. Phil gestured towards the old lady and Dan said something to the woman. Phil was grateful to have a friend like Dan. He would have survived himself but it was easier this way.

After Dan had paid the batteries he gave them to Phil who immediately put them in their place. When he turned the hearing aids back on he sighed in relief. Finally he could talk to Dan.

“Thank you so much” Phil said to Dan.

“You’re welcome. I’m glad they had them”

“I can pay you back someday, I promise. Batteries are expensive” Phil said, looking a bit embarrassed.

“Thanks. I really need the money. But no hurry tho” Dan said and smiled.

“What did the lady want from me when we were standing in the line?” Phil asked. She had looked kinda terrifying.

“Oh she just thought you were his grandson. She had very bad vision and you looked similar to him apparently. When I told him you weren’t his grandson she just turned around and strode off. Energetic woman she was” Dan explained to Phil.

“Oh thank god! I was actually scared when she talked to me. I had no idea what she was talking about so I panicked” Phil said feeling relieved.

“It’s fine. But we should hurry now. The class is about to start”

 

_Two weeks later_

It was friday and Dan and Phil had their last lesson of the week.

“That was the worst class ever!” Dan cried when he and Phil walked out of math classroom.

“I know right. Why do I have to know how to find angles of triangles?” Phil said.

Phil had started to wear his hearing aids again. Now that he had a friend to talk to, he didn’t see a reason to not wear them.

“Triangles can go and find their own angles” Dan said sounding frustrated.

Phil chuckled: “I agree. Fuck them”

“Woah there Phil! Mind your language” Dan said sarcastically.

“Shut up!” Phil squealed and punched Dan’s arm gently.

“I have to go to bathroom” Dan said suddenly, “Do you want to come?”

“Of course not. But I can wait outside the stall, if you want” Phil smirked.

“That’s what I meant you spork! Come on let’s go”

The boys arrived to the toilets and Dan entered one of the smaller rooms. Phil waited outside, scrolling through his phone, when suddenly he heard a voice:

“Look who’s here. All alone like always”

Phil looked up and saw jason approaching him. He felt something drop in his stomach and his blood started to boil immediately.

“You’re not going to answer? I’m not surprised. You are too stupid to talk am I right?” Jason said evilly.

“Shut up!” Phil said quietly.

“Nah. How’s your boyfriend doing? Are you having fun?” Jason asked.

“Dan is not my boyfriend. Go away!” Phil almost shouted, heat rising to his ears.

“That’s what you say, you fag. But I guess it’s better if two weirdos are together so normal people can live in peace” Jason said. He was clearly trying to annoy Phil.

“Don’t say anything about Dan!” Phil said. He used all his self control trying not to shout.

“Ooh. Are you trying to protect your boyfriend? How cute. It’s no use tho, because you are just a pathetic little prat. Did you pay him to be your friend?”

“Go away or I’ll punch you!” Phil said, raising his voice.

“Oh don’t shout” Jason said, “We don’t want Danny boy to hear” Jason talked like Phil was three year old child with a severe problem in understanding.

“What are you two doing?” Dan suddenly asked. He had just come from the toilet.

“We are just having a little discussion here. Nothing serious” Jason said, smiling.

Dan looked at Phil and saw from his face that Jason was lying. Phil looked angry and his face was red.  
“Doesn’t look like it” Dan said. “Can you please just leave?”

“Don’t you remember what I said to you couple of weeks ago? Don’t befriend Phil Lester. I tried to be helpful but you didn’t listen. You are now on my blacklist and no one in that list tells me to ‘just leave’” Jason had now moved closer to Dan, leaving Phil farther behind him.

“I don’t care about your ‘blacklist’. If you have problems with either me or Phil, you don’t have to talk to us” Dan said calmly.

“Good idea” Jason said and without a warning smashed his fist at Phil’s face. Phil was not prepared and flew backwards, landing on his butt. Dan watched as Jason ran away from the bathrooms, laughing.

“Phil are you alright!?” Dan cried and rushed to Phil. His nose was bleeding and his face was already covered in blood.

“What happened?” Phil asked, looking flustered.

“Jason punched you in the face. You are bleeding” Dan said, trying to sound calm and failing.

“That dickhead”

“I’ll take you to the nurse? Would that be good?” Dan asked. He had no idea what to do.

“No. I can manage. Where’s my other hearing aid? It fell out, I think” Phil said, trying to look around him.

“Umm…” Dan looked around, searching for the small plastic piece. “It’s there! I can fetch it for you”

“Please”

Dan stood up and walked to the hearing aid. It had flown about five metres away from Phil. Dan returned and gave the aid back to Phil.

“Thanks. Can you help me up?” Phil asked and reached out towards Dan’s hand.

“Here” Dan said and took Phil’s hand. He pulled him up and helped him to stand. Phil wavered for a moment but found his balance.

“I feel dizzy. And my head hurts” Phil said and looked at Dan.

“I would be surprised if it didn’t. Take some paper and try to stop the bleeding”

“Luckily I wasn’t wearing my classes” Phil said and pressed his nose with paper. “That would have been even worse”  
“Do you have classes?” Dan asked. He didn’t know. Suddenly it occurred to him how little he knew about Phil. He had known him only for a month but they had grown so close that it seemed like forever. Dan decided he had to get to know Phil much better.

“Yeah, I do. I use contact lenses almost everyday but at weekends I wear glasses. Giving some rest to my eyes” Phil said and smiled a bit.

“Looking forward to seeing you in glasses” Dan winked.

“You know what. I have to take these out of my ears. They make my headache worse. Sorry” Phil said apologetically.

“Oh… Sure. We can walk in silence it’s fine. We’ll go to your house?” Dan asked.

“Yeah that would be great” Phil said and took his hearing aids out. He pocketed them and smiled at Dan. Dan pointed towards door and they left the bathroom.

As they walked in silence, Dan took Phil’s hand in his own. Phil looked at Dan, questioning look on his face. Dan just smiled, nodded and continued to walk to freedom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That chapter was quite... Um... Angsty? I'm not sure.
> 
> Comments and kudos are welcomed, also remember to subscribe! The next chapter will be up in couple of days :)


	5. Claustrophobia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi lads! I'd like to thank everyone who has read this fic! Every kudos and every hit means the world to me so thank you! :)

_Three weeks later_

It was Saturday and Phil was visiting Dan. Dan had texted him to come over, so Phil did and they had been spending time together for half an hour. Dan had an idea:

“We should go outside. Maybe walk around a bit. I’m feeling like I need some air”

“Good idea. I rarely go outside” Phil said.

“Me neither. It’s good time to do so” Dan said and stood up from a beanbag he had been lying on. “Is it cold there?”

“Not that cold. I had only my jacket with me” Phil answered. It was autumn and leafs had started to fall from trees.

“Ok. Gimme a minute and I’ll grab mine” Dan said and disappeared to his walk-in closet.

Dan’s house was very modern. Phil lived in an old house with very traditional decorations. Dan’s house however was modern and white. Everything was shining and clean. Phil liked decor like this, but didn’t dislike his home decor either. Dan’s house was also an apartment house which had 15 floors. Dan lived on the 11th. Luckily the building had a lift.

“Okay I’m ready!” Dan called and appeared again. He was wearing a black and white bomber jacket. Phil had a bomber jacket too, but it was white with blue sleeves and a hint of red.

“Let’s go then! Do you have keys?” Phil ensured.

Dan hit his pockets. “Yes! Let’s go Philly!”

Dan opened the front door and they found themselves standing in the staircase of the building. Dan locked the door behind him and put the keys back in his pocket.

“I’ll call the lift!” Phil shouted like a child. He and his brother had always fought about who got to press the button.

“No, I will” Dan answered and bumped to Phil, almost knocking him over. Phil didn’t give up and pushed Dan again, winning. He then pressed the button with a smug smile on his face.

“I said I would press it” Phil said cheerfully.

“At least I tried” Dan said and moved closer to Phil, waiting for the lift to arrive.

The lift arrived with a small ‘ping’ and the door slid open. Phil stepped inside, pressing the button that said ‘1’. Dan followed him and punched him gently in the arm as he saw that Phil had pressed the button again.

“You nerd. Always pressing the buttons” Dan laughed kindly.

“You can MAYBE press them when we get back” Phil said and winked playfully at Dan.

“I can’t wait” Dan said sarcastically.

The lift started to move down and Dan and Phil stood in silence, looking at the mirrors covering the walls. They were on the sixth floor when suddenly the lift stopped. It had stopped in the middle of two floors.

“Oh my god!” Phil breathed out.

“What happened? Did we do something?” Dan asked, panic creeping in his voice.

“I have no idea. What should we do?”

“I don’t know! I have no fucking idea!” Dan shouted.

“Okay. Calm down Dan. Don’t panic” Phil said calmly.

“I’m trying. I just have claustrophobia and I think I’ll die” Dan whispered.

  
“You are not gonna die. Think positively. We are totally fine and nothing will happen to us” Phil said, trying to calm Dan down.

“Could we try pressing the buttons again?” Dan suggested.

“Try it. It won’t probably make it worse”

Dan pressed the button of the first floor. The lift moved a bit but stopped then again. Dan tried to press the “doors open” button but nothing happened.

“For fuck’s sake!” Dan shouted, startling Phil.

“We have to call to someone” Phil said and took out his phone.

“But who? The lift control?”

“I think so. Is there number anywhere?” Phil asked and looked around the lift.

“There! I can read it aloud for you” Dan offered and said the number to Phil.

“Okay I think I got it. I’ll call them” Phil said and pressed the call button on his phone.

The phone started to beep and Phil looked at Dan, waiting. The someone answered:

“Hello?”

“Hi. Is this lift control?” Phil asked, hoping for the best.

“Yeah. Do you have some kind of problem?” The guy on the other end asked. He sounded very bored on his job.

“Yes. We are stuck in a lift. It stopped between the floors and we can’t get out” Phil said.

“Have you tried pressing the buttons?” Bored voice asked.

“Yes we tried. It didn’t help”

“Well it looks like you are stuck. Can I have your names and then I’ll send help.

“Sure. But what do you need our names for?”

“What? Can you speak more clearly. I don’t understand you” The man said.

Phil sighed: “What do you need our names for?”

“Oh. I just need to know who you are in case you are playing a prank on us” The man said.

“Okay. I’m Philip Lester and my friend is Daniel Howell”

“Philip Lester… Daniel Howell…” The man muttered when he wrote them down.

“Okay. I’ll send help. It’ll take approximately half an hour” The man said again.

“Half an hour!?” Phil squealed. He looked at Dan who looked shocked. “Can’t you make it faster?”

“Sorry, son. That’s all you get. Bye” The man said and hung up.

Phil lowered his phone slowly from his ear and looked at Dan. Their eyes met and Phil saw that Dan could lose his mind at any moment.

“I can’t do this” Dan said. He started to panic.

“Dan calm down! Sit down” Phil said and pointed at the floor.

Dan sat down and Phil sat next to him, their shoulders touching. Dan was breathing heavily and looking at the wall in front of him.

“Dan it’ll be alright. At least you are not alone here” Phil said.

Dan lifted his eyes to Phil’s and just stared at him for a moment. “I’m glad you are here”

“We can do this. Let’s talk about something. What was your former school like?” Phil asked.

“Umm… It was crappy. I had no friends. I wasn’t bullied that bad but no one wanted to talk to me”

“I had no friends either before you” Phil said.

“You are my best friend Phil. I’m just thinking that if I was still in my old school I would be stuck in this lift all alone. I’m so happy you are here with me” Dan said quietly.

“You are my best friend too Dan. I will never leave you”

“Do you want to know why I have a claustrophobia?” Dan asked suddenly.

“Sure”

“When I was 10 my classmates took my stuff and threw them to a cleaning cupboard. When I went to get them back, they locked the door and I couldn’t get out. I tried to shout but no one heard me. It was the last lesson so everyone left the building. I was in that cupboard overnight. I slept on cleaning supplies and tried to imagine I was in my own bed. A cleaning lady found me at the morning and called the headmaster. She came to talk to me and said my mom had been very worried about me. I told the headmaster I had been locked in there but she didn’t believe me. I was an emo kid so she thought I was just being me. The boys who locked me in had never any consequences. And that’s why I have claustrophobia.” Dan closed his eyes and tried to imagine he was in an open field. It didn’t work.

“That… That’s horrible” Phil said and wrapped his arm around Dan’s shoulders.

“Yeah I guess. I never spoke to those people ever again”

“Is that why you changed schools?” Phil asked.

“It’s part of the reason. I didn’t have any friends there so I wanted to change. I’m glad I did” Dan said and smiled a little.

Phil just smiled and rubbed Dan’s shoulder slowly, trying to calm him down. Dan rested his head on Phil’s shoulder and closed his eyes, trying to forget he was stuck in a lift. The boys stayed like that until the rescue team came and let them out of the lift. Dan and Phil thanked the men and decided to go back inside. They deserved some hot cocoa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor boys :( This was a little shorter chapter but it would've been weird to continue it. so yeah :)
> 
> I actually had to google "how to survive being stuck in a lift" for this chapter. Thanks wikihow!
> 
> The next chapter will be the last and we'll get to know Phil a bit more. Stay tuned by subscribing and maybe you want to comment and kudos too? 
> 
> See y'all!


	6. His story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends! Welcome to read the last chapter. 
> 
> Tw: suicidal thoughts

It was late Saturday night and Dan and Phil had recovered from the lift accident. They were sitting on the sofa of Dan’s room. Phil had decided to stay a night over at Dan’s house. Dan was in his browsing position and Phil was watching baking programs from TV. It was comfortably silent only to be broken by Dan who wanted to ask something about Phil.

“Phil…” Dan started, putting his laptop away.

“Yeah?

“Is it too personal if I ask you how you became deaf?” Dan asked hesitantly.

“No of course not. Actually, no one has ever asked me that before. This is kinda long story so prepare yourself” Phil said mystically.

“I’m prepared” Dan laughed and concentrated.

“Well, I wasn’t born deaf. That would be kinda boring story. I actually was able to hear until I was like five years old. My family was about to fly to France to have a beach holiday. As we were driving to the airport, a car crashed to us. It hit at the side of our car I was sitting. There was lot of screaming and loud noises and I had no idea what was going on. All I knew was pain all over my body. I went unconscious and that’s all I remember from that accident. Later we found out that the driver was drunk. Everyone else in my family survived without major injuries but I lost my hearing. Something happened in my inner ear, I’m still not sure what. However, two days later I woke up in the hospital unable to hear anything. I still remember the panic that hit me. I tried to speak or make some kind of noise. I screamed and I could feel my throat hurting but no sound came out. My mom tried to comfort me but it was useless. All I felt was pain everywhere. The pain was so intense I thought it would never end. Painkillers didn’t help. I was so young that I didn’t understand what was happening. Doctors tried to help me with no results. They even did some kind of surgery to my left ear, but it didn’t work. I was only five when all of this happened so I didn’t understand anything about this whole thing. I couldn’t read or hear so I just lay there in the hospital bed watching people talking without any noise. Suffering because no one didn’t know how much in pain I was. My mom sat next to me and stroked my hand, her mouth moving. I didn’t understand her and I became so frustrated I nearly lost my mind”

“Oh Phil” Dan said.

“It’s okay Dan. Everything’s okay now”

“What happened then? Did you get some kind of therapy?” Dan asked, looking very focused now.

“I think it had been three weeks since the accident. The doctors came in and they gave me hearing aids. I was really happy that I was able to hear finally. As the first relief faded, I noticed that I couldn’t hear perfectly. All sounded kinda robotic. Of course I don’t remember all of that but that’s what I have been told. After that I got home from hospital and everyone from our family started to study sign language, including me. It was necessary as I couldn’t wear my aids all the time and they had to be able to communicate with me. And of course I had to communicate with them.”

“When I turned six I started learning to read. It was a big relief to everyone because that way I could do more things independently. I learned easily but I couldn’t read aloud for some reason. It was just impossible to me. But no one understood me. They said ‘I should just practise’ and that ‘I was not trying enough’. I was trying my best but that wasn’t enough. That’s why I stopped wearing my hearing aids. When I wore them everyone was pressuring me to read aloud and to speak more. But when I didn’t, I was left alone and I had my own peace to read. No one said I didn’t try my best. I didn’t have to do things I didn’t want to…” A single tear fell from Phil’s eye. Dan was crying too. How could people be so cruel?

“As the years passed I isolated myself from other people and spent more time on my own. I read a lot and played video games. I also watched many tv shows, while wearing my hearing aids. At home no one made me do things I couldn’t. I felt safe to be who I was. I had no friends but I didn’t feel lonely. But no one didn’t see that as a good thing. All they saw were my flaws and how they could fix them. They saw me as a boy who was deaf. Nothing more. No one cared about my opinion. I was happy but that was not the point. I had to be fixed. Teachers pressured me to make friends but I didn’t want to. I was broken. ‘I wasn’t even trying’ they said. Didn’t they see I was trying? Didn’t they see I suffered too?”, Phil was now crying. All these feelings he had kept inside had now bursted out. That was mainly because of Dan, his only friend. It was a good thing.

“Phil… Come here” Dan said and stretched his arms towards Phil, who moved to Dan’s side.

“I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked about this” Dan said keeping Phil in his arms.

“Don’t feel sorry. I want to tell you the whole story” Phl said. He really wanted to get everything out of his chest.

“As I turned 14, people started to pick on me in school. They thought it would be funny to hide my stuff and watch me try to find it. I hated them but I didn’t tell anyone. I was sure I could deal with them. But I couldn’t. I was so miserable I really thought about killing myself and I almost did, but then I saw that I had bright future if I survived. If I could survive school I could survive anything. That kept me going. And I’m glad I did”

“Last year was the worst. My mother decided that I needed therapy and she took me to a therapist. The therapist was the worst human in the entire world. She was not able to see my problems. Like all other people, all she saw was my deafness. She didn’t see my mental problems. How could she? I was just a boy whose parents were happily married and I had a loving family. I was good at school. Why would I have problems? ‘Only people with family problems can have problems.’ I had serious mental problems but she didn’t care. All she did was ask me about my hearing and how I made friends. I told her I didn’t have any and she said I should try get some. She didn’t see my depression as a problem. The only problem I had was my deafness, according to her. As a solution she suggested that I should wear my hearing aids more. I told her they hurt but she said I was being silly. I went there five times and after that I got enough. My problem was not my deafness! Why wouldn’t anyone understand?” Phil was so frustrated about everything at this point that he couldn’t continue. He was crying on Dan’s chest and Dan was stroking his hair, trying to calm him down. After a moment Phil was able to continue:

“I was again about to give up but then you showed up. Stepping in from that classroom door and smiling to everyone. And then you poked me at that biology class. When I told you about my deafness you didn’t care about it. You just apologized for yourself. Many people say they are sorry for me. They think they know how I feel but they really don’t. I don’t care that I am deaf. That’s why I decided to talk to you more. You saw me behind my deafness. I am grateful for that. You made me feel I was enough. I was worth of something. Thank you Dan for being here because without you I wouldn’t be sitting here” Phil ended his story and hugged Dan tightly.

Dan thought about what Phil had just said. There was so much pain in his words that Dan had felt it too. People had treated Phil like an object for so long. But now Phil would be with him and for Dan, Phil was worth more than anything.

“Phil. I hope you know that you are worth more than anything to me” Dan said quietly yo Phil.

“Thank you Dan. You are my everything too” Phil answered, still crying silently.

"I love you Phil"

"I love you Dan"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really relieved that I managed to do this and make it to the end. This was my first chaptered fic and I never thought anyone would read it. Thank you to all people who sticked around and enjoyed this story :)
> 
> Also, would you guys want me to make a sequel of some sort? Like, 5 years later or something? Let me know in the comments!


End file.
